I'm just a young woman from New Jersey who went to Brazil and fell in love, not just with the country, but with a wonderful Brasileiro from Salvador, Bahia. This is an account of how our crazy situation of living thousands of miles away is working.
There's something to be said for a really good, long conversation. I had one of those with dear boyfriend on our anniversary, and after a week of craziness due to Carnaval happening in Brazil (and him being out partying for a few nights and then away at the beach without internet access) it was just what we needed! We had hardly talked for a week because of both our schedules and the fact that we only communicate online so it can be hard when one person doesn't have internet access. I was especially bummed on Valentine's day because we didn't get to talk, and we didn't even celebrate it much. That's understandable, because we celebrated "Dia dos namorados," which is the Brazilian equivalent of valentine's day, but in June. Plus, I didn't really mention to dear boyfriend how much of a big deal it is here in the U.S., because I didn't really think it would be a big deal, but when the day rolled around I just felt bummed that we weren't together and that he didn't even acknowledge it (again, my fault). In fact, the only thing one of the few things I got for Valentine's day was a card from my Grandma oh so subtly hinting about how my relationship is a bad idea and going to Brazil would be a mistake, and finding a job in the U.S. would be so much better. But that's a story for another day. Just gotta throw out there though, as much as she can be a pain, I love my Abuela (Grandma), and she's been getting a little better about not being rude when she buds in (buts in?) to my love life.
But, I'm not complaining, because dear bf and I have been having some really enjoyable conversations lately and it's just nice! Not that we don't normally enjoy talking to each other, but I guess absence really does make the heart grow fonder...you'd think I'd have figured that one out by now! We talked about the future, about me going there, about him coming to visit here, and about all sorts of funny and entertaining things, including a random discussion of which Portuguese word for 'procrastinate' would be appropriate to use at dinner with the President (don't ask, we're weird). And to top it all off, he got a new computer (a cute little 10in netbook) that has a built in webcam! Which means, it also has a working microphone, so we can actually talk while we're on webcam! And he can use skype to call me. Today I managed to convince him to be less shy of using the webcam (he's generally just not a camera person)and I got to see him for a while, which was so nice. Let's see how long that lasts.
Anyway, things are good. That's all. Okay, maybe not all I'll leave you with this song and music video that never fails to make me smile: Ja sei Namorar by Os Tribalistas (lyrics and translation can be found here)
Well, yesterday (December 18th) marked our 10 month anniversary! We haven't really ever done anything to celebrate the 'small' anniversaries, but you bet we will when we hit that one year mark! We've both been super busy with finals so we didn't even get a chance to talk yesterday, but I thought it would be nice to take some time to reflect on the last 10 months, considering that 11 months ago I never would have imagined being in the situation I'm in now!
Some things I've learned in the last 10 months:
Sometimes when you're scared shitless, you have to take that first baby step of dipping your toe in the water, but then you just have to jump right in! I knew I wanted to develop this relationship with dear bf, but I was scared. Mostly scared of how we would ever make it work, and scared that it would turn out the same as my previous LDR. But he is quite convincing, so here I am. You have to take a chance on happiness!
Being in an LDR can be a roller coaster ride, but I don't regret it one bit. Sometimes it sucks, not being able to be with your partner. It's hard. You miss them. But I'd rather have a thousand days away from him than not have him in my life at all. Despite our struggles (LDR related an otherwise), he makes me happy. Plus, it gives me the excuse to travel to Brazil, hahah!
I tend to go through phases of being really interested in something. On a more personal note, I realized that I tend to get really interested (maybe slightly obsessed?) with something. Last year it was travel and backpacking. Now, more specifically, it's Brazil. Not so sure this phase will ware off though! I do, after all, have 20+ brazil related blogs that I follow in google reader, hahaha. But the point is that knowing dear bf has gotten me interested in something new (although I was obviously interested in brazil before, since I decided to go there on my own), and I like getting interested in his country, culture, and language because I think it creates a bit of a better understanding.
My mom always said that the best way to learn a language is to fall in love, and boy was she right! Though I never doubted that assertion, I sure have learned it for myself! A year ago I would sit in the dining hall at "portuguese table" with some lovely brazilian ladies (who are now dear friends of mine) and try to catch a word here, a word there. When they'd ask me a question, they'd often have to repeat it, and I'd reply in spanish once I understood. I didn't think I'd ever get to the point where I was only communicating (and fairly well, I might add) with someone (dear bf) in portuguese! Ok, so it is frustrating when I can't say exactly what I want to say in exactly the way I want to say it (you wouldn't beleive how we take this for granted in our native language!), but I learn a little bit each day. Definitely some good motivation. And although they are two different languages, being fluent in Spanish certainly helped. Plus, I have to thank my mom for that easy language learning gene (she speaks 5 languages! Ironically, the one romance language she doesn't speak is portuguese). But still...just fall in love with someone who doesn't speak your first language, and you'll be running for that dictionary and babbling in no time!
Ok, I know I've learned a lot more than that, but I can't think of anything else right now, probably due to the ~30 painting names, artisits, and the year painted (plus other random facts/interpretations) that I crammed into my brain for my Art History exam yesterday. I should be working on other finals anyway, ahhh! Maybe I'll write a follow-up post later. And if anyone is actually reading this (whether you know me in real life or not) feel free to comment :)
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